Nick had been waiting for what felt like a lifetime. Waiting in the shadows hoping one day, the object of his desires would realise his true feelings for him. Waiting and hoping that he wouldn’t have to spell it out for him because the thought of coming clean scared him more than the prospect of rejection. It had been seven years since he’d first met Greg; the day took a permanent spot in the fore front of his mind. He’d thought about men in that way before but he’d never acted it on and he’d never planned to with the lab rat turned CSI. But the way he felt about Greg was completely different from the way he’d ever felt about anyone before. Every longing glance, every accidental touch stayed in his head and he replayed them over and over again once he was in the safety of his own home. He’d had countless amounts of dreams about Greg coming clean and telling Nick he felt the same, pushing his soft lips into Nick’s, slowly fucking him until he couldn’t take it anymore. He’d never planned to tell Greg the truth until that night; that night when his world had changed. When he’d got the call telling him that Greg had been beaten within an inch of his life he swore he felt his world crumbling right from under him. He’d spent more time than was probably normal at the hospital with him while he recovered, he knew his co workers would be talking; after all he’d done the same thing years ago when Greg was in hospital after the lab explosion. But he didn’t care anymore, he didn’t care if his friends and co workers knew his secret; he was in love with Greg and there was nothing he could do about that. Watching him in the hospital he couldn’t help but wonder what if Greg hadn’t made it and he would have never been able to tell him the truth? So now he sat waiting in the diner for Greg it was do or die time; now or never. |
He’d never had any clarification that Greg liked men, he’d seen him with plenty of women over the years but then again Nick had never been one to flaunt his sexuality maybe Greg wasn’t either. The only thing he could go by was the looks that seemed to last a little too long or the touches that happened all too often. Greg always looked a little too pleased to see him and over the years Nick had started to believe that maybe Greg did feel the same. His heart nearly skipped a beat when he saw Greg step over the threshold of the diner, his mass of blonde waves flopping onto his beautiful face. His large brown eyes light up when he saw Nick sat at a lone table in the back, trying his best to get some privacy from the rest of the diners. He made his way slowly to the table where his friend sat and smiled as he slid in opposite him. Nick was a sucker for that Sanders smile. Greg quickly got the waitresses attention an ordered a coffee and sat back in his chair and looked at Nick. The bruises on his face had mostly vanished but Nick remembered exactly where they’d been as if he could still see them.
‘How are you G?’ he asked looked intently at the younger man. ‘We haven’t really had a chance to talk since the accident and the trial.’
Greg smiled at Nick, he loved that there was someone who cared as much as he did. The waitress soon brought over Greg’s coffee and he thanked her before she left.
‘I’m really good actually. Well apart from the looming civil suit the James family served me with but Grissom’s assured me I’ll be alright. How are you?’ he took a sip of the coffee and pulled a face. ‘God I hate the coffee here.’ He added. Nick laughed a little and fiddled with his own cup feeling slightly awkward.
‘Yeah I’m not too bad. Shattered after that double shift but otherwise I’m fine.’ He couldn’t help but smile at Greg. Being so close to him made his heart do little summersaults every time Greg smiled or flicked a strand of sandy blonde hair away from his eye.
‘Yeah tell me about it, that shift was a killer. Any plans for your night off tomorrow?’ he asked now taking small sips of the horrible coffee he’d been given. Sometimes he wished everywhere sold his beautiful Blue Hawaiian blend.
‘Probably catching up on some well needed sleep.’ Nick laugh. ‘How about you?’
‘Same here I think. I’ve only just started sleeping again since the accident so it’s all I really do in my time off.’ Greg admitted. What he didn’t say was that the reason he couldn’t sleep is because he’d been plagued with nightmares of the gang pulling him from his car and beating him, hitting the boy with his Denali in the alleyway. But Nick knew him and he probably knew what Greg was going through. The two men sat in silence for a while sipping coffee and listening to the background noise of the other diners. Nick knew he had to do this but finding the right words was becoming harder than he’d anticipated. He took a deep breath and looked up at Greg.
‘Hey G, I was wondering…’ he began, but as soon as Greg looked up at him with those amazing eyes Nick lost his trail of thought.
‘Yeah Nick?’ Greg smiled sweetly at him. Nick swallowed hard and took a subtle breath.
‘I was wondering if you wanted to get dinner or something tomorrow night seeing as we’re both off.’ There he had said, now all he had to do was wait for Greg to reply. All of a sudden Greg started to laugh, nearly spitting his coffee across the table.
‘Dude that almost sounds like you’re asking me on a date!’ he covered his mouth as he swallowed the coffee and looked up at Nick who wasn’t laughing. Greg’s facial expression suddenly became serious.
‘You’re not asking me on a date are you man? Because that would be a bit weird. Nick Stokes gay? I can’t see it man.’ Greg said trying to keep his composure as he looked on at Nick. This had to be a joke right? Nick didn’t reply for sometime, making Greg feel uncomfortable.
‘Nick man come on… I mean I can understand when people think I’m gay, but you? No one would ever believe that.’ Greg tried laughing it off again. Suddenly Nick’s mouth began to form a smile.
‘No dude of course I’m joking! Me gay, that’s funny.’ Nick said trying hide the hurt look from his eyes. Greg laughed properly this time.
‘You had me going for a minute man! Anyway I’ve gotta go, I’ve got a hot date with this girl Jenny, she’s smoking hot man!’ Greg downed the rest of his coffee and bounded up from the table like a playful puppy.
‘God they really need to do something about the coffee in here.’ He said before patting his friend on the back.
‘Enjoy your night off man. Dinner that was brilliant. See you back at work.’ Greg waved as he headed towards the door. Back in the parking lot as he located his Denali Greg’s smiled had wiped off his face. He knew Nick hadn’t been joking, he’d known for a long time that Nick had feelings for him but he’d never thought he would actually come clean about it. Greg’s initial reaction had been to laugh it off because god knows he didn’t know what else he could do. Nick was his best friend and he didn’t want to have to reject him and face ruining their friendship but despite what people might think of him Greg wasn’t, nor had he ever been interested in men. He climbed into his car and sat in the driver’s seat for a moment thinking. He felt bad for the way he’d reacted but if that’s what he had to do to save their friendship then he knew it would be worth Nick hating him for a few days.
In the diner Nick sat with his head in his hands for a long while after Greg left. How could he have laughed at him? He was spilling his heart out over the table and Greg had just laughed at him. Maybe it was for the best, Nick thought. Maybe he wasn’t supposed to be with Greg. He’d tried, granted he’d failed miserably but at least he’d given it a shot; he got the answer he’d been expecting. Suddenly Nick forgot he was in the diner as the impact of what had just happened hit him. The past seven years of loving Greg came rushing at him all at once and not caring who could see him, he began to cry tears that threatened to never stop.